Quick Tokes: Richard Nixon Was Not A Dewby Brother

• Richard Nixon was NOT a Dewby Brother. That is all.
• Dewby-rollin' Master Class begins at the 1:28 mark...
• Glenn Beck: What a shithead
• Eric Holder is a Dewby Brother
• Fuck these police (I'm not one for blanket statements)
• Kellogg's takes it on the chin
• "Taxing pot could become a political toking point": As legalization inevitably draws nearer, expect more and more awful headline puns (see above).
• "Smoke This Recession: First we tax the booze. Then we legalize the pot. Done."
• One for the Dewby Reading List

To all my Dewby brothers and sisters- have a great weekend!

Thursday Happy Hour: Reggae For A Rainy Day

It's cold and rainy here in Dewbyville. In other words, it's the perfect time for some reggae...enjoy!

I've been saying this for years

Not only would this create additional revenue through local sales taxes but it would also create jobs which would provide federal and state revenue through taxes. In addition the amount of money wasted on prosecuting and incarceration also adds up to a small fortune. Why fight something you can't win while at the same time generating lots of revenue on the local, state and federal level. It seems like a fairly logical argument to me. Lets hope our government can see this too.

This is Fabulous!

Hip Hop artists have long been known for their pot consumption but seriously isn't 500 pounds taking it just a little far. Thanks Fabolous for the blog material.

Alas, I Found This A Bit Too Late For Valentine's Day...

(Via)

Time To Put Some Dewby In Your Funk: It's Happy Hour!

Let's get it started! This Thursday Happy Hour post brought to you by Death Row, and is dedicated to the homies that were down from day one. It's Dre Day.



Of course, none of this would have been possible without the originators of the G funk:

News Nugs

Another week, another pile-up of dewby news! Here are some quick hits, a few little bingers to brighten up your day:

• "Whiff Of change In US Medical Marijuana Policy": "It is no longer federal policy to beat up on hippies."
• The latest in Phelps news: "Feigned Outrage"
• Speaking of, who does this guy think he is? Michael motherfuckin' Phelps?
• "Advice For the New Drug Czar": Surprisingly, it was not "puff, puff, pass."
• "You may want to break out the bong for this one.": You don't have to tell me twice.
• And finally: an oldie but a goodie.
  

As Predicted...

...even a zealot like Sheriff Leon Lott- seen here with his Imperial Battle Cruiser- couldn't figger out a way to drug test a photograph:

“We had a photo and him saying he was sorry for inappropriate behavior,” Lott said at a news conference. “He never said, ‘I smoked marijuana.’ We didn’t have physical evidence.”

So...no charges against Phelps, as anyone with half a brain could have foreseen. Let's hope the other, non-celebrity defendants get off too.

Thursday Happy Hour: Expensive Shit!

No, this is not a follow-up to Herschel's post about dewbynomics. This is about justice. And dewby. Sweet, sweet dewby.

"The men in uniform allege I swallowed some quantity of hemp. My shit was sent for lab test. Result negative. Which brings us to..."

How is it that we have not yet posted any Fela? As the man himself might have said, "It's no possible!"

Not only is Fela a legend, but his tale of "expensive shit"- being set up by the cops on a dewby possession rap- is still relevant. When you think about it, that kind of expensive shit is still going on today. At least the Nigerian police had a sample of Fela's shit to test (or so they thought- legend has it that Fela had another inmate donate his "clean" shit to the cause).

Anyways, here in the good ol' U.S. of A., we have shitheaded police who think, I dunno, that they can somehow drug test a photograph. (Oh, and dudes, I totally predicted it: they arrested the bong owner for- wait for it!- trying to sell it on eBay. Dumbass.) Of course, the Michael Phelps incident is simply representative of the plight of tens of thousands of Americans- most of whom lack celebrity and riches- caught up in our government's war against a plant. I think Fela would have found our co-called "Drug War" as amusing as he would find it appalling.


Oh wait- this was supposed to be a Happy Hour post, right? Brothers and sisters, I don't know about you, but it's been an awful long week here in Dewbyland. So, without further ado, let's get into it and get it started proper with some classic Fela:

Keep Your Pipe Clean

Marijuana Linked to Agressive Testicular Cancer

According to this news article, smoking marijuana, or weed as some people might say, can result in an increased risk for a certain aggressive type of testicular cancer. While I don't dispute this, there is one factor that this research has not taken into account. What is that factor? Ejaculation.

Now, I'm no doctor, and I'm not on TV (actuall I was, but I didn't play a doctor), but I have read studies showing that regular male ejaculation decreases the risk for testicular cancer. Its the whole moving water vs stagnant water thing. Ejaculating literally cleans the pipes.

Now, I don't know about ya'll, but for me smoking grass definately enhances the sensation of ejaculation. So, if you get high, get high at least 5 times a week and make sure to ejaculate every time. This can be done by yourself, with a partner, with many partners, toys, and so on. Just make sure to be safe and smart. Oh, and don't forget the after ejaculation smoke in case she's not done and you have to do it all over again.

(Word up to reader R. Dewby for bringing this article to our attention)

Fat guys with dope?

My fellow Dewby brothers alerted me to a news article regarding pot smoking sumo wrestlers and felt that since my wife is Japanese that I'm somehow qualified to speak about this outrage against tradition. While I definately understand the spiritual connectedness of the wrestlers, the one question that keeps popping into my head as I ponder the severety of this event.......how else do you make a guy hungry enough to eat 70 lbs of rice a day?

Will Somebody PLEASE Hand This Guy A Dewby?

Seriously, you need to chill the fuck out Batman.

Yes, I get that the DP was interfering with the integrity of your character and taking you out of the headspace you so desperately need to occupy in order to deliver a realistic, organic and believable performance as a buff dude killing robots in the future. I for one hope that the overall quality of Terminator 4 will not be compromised by his callous disregard for your art.

In the meantime, on behalf of all of us here at The Dewby Brothers, we encourage you to relax for a moment and take a deep breath. Preferably from a bong.

Dewby News: Quick Hits

Brothers and sisters, the amount of dewby news that piles up on a daily and weekly basis is simply staggering. So staggering, in fact, that even the most dedicated dewby disciple could never sort the sticks and seeds of nonsense from the nuggets of newsy goodness.

Therefore, I, Austin Dewby, am hereby instituting a new feature which (until I come up with a better name) I will call "Quick Hits." Think of it as the news equivalent of that little onnie that gets you through the day, rather than the big spliff you kick back and relax with once you're home.

Without further ado...

• Run for the border!
• Know Your Mushrooms.
• George Obama For President
• Swiss Police/Google Earth Fuckery
• Could Drug Money Save The Ailing Global Economy?
• What Michael Phelps SHOULD HAVE said: "Grow up America. I am the most accomplished Olympic athlete ever. I am an adult. What I do with my brain is my own business."
  

Do Your Children Have Friends? Maybe They Shouldn't.

Teens Who Frequently Go Out With Friends More Likely To Use Marijuana. Probably Because It's Fun.

I came across this article and found it interesting. It brought up some very good points that I thought I should share. I have included a brief paragraph.

“Cannabis [marijuana] use among young people is a serious public health concern," the authors write as background information in the article. Recent evidence links marijuana use to motor vehicle accidents, injuries, inflammatory and cancerous changes in the airways and mental health problems, including depression. Long-term detrimental effects include poor academic performance and failure to complete schooling, impeding development and hampering future career opportunities.”

What I find more interesting is that the study ignores factors such as if you are a loser, if you are a lemming, etc. I think these factors play a much larger role in determining “impeding development or future career opportunities.” The article then goes on to say that limiting teen’s access to interact with peers and go socialize could lead to “unintended consequences.” Like what….impeding development, depression. Not to mention that the countries that experienced a decline in dewby use over the years are countries that have decriminalized…..Go Figure.

Sportsman of the Year

Michael Phelps is this years winner of the Dewby Brothers "Sportsman Of the Year"!

You make us so proud with all of your achievements over the past year.